Not Aborting My Plan

I was walking on campus today, backpack tight against my shoulders, one headphone in my ear, phone in my back pocket, when I saw a poster calling me a baby killer. [excerpt

I\u27m In Pain, But You Can\u27t See It

Two weeks after I returned home from my freshman year at Gettysburg, I suffered a nervous breakdown. I couldn’t get out of bed even though I was unable to sleep. I had no appetite and it felt like pins and needles were constantly poking at my hands and feet. I spent hours wishing for sleep so that I could get some relief, yet I felt so terrified of the possibility that dreams would follow unconsciousness that I turned lights on, played loud music, and sat at my desk in an attempt to do anything that would prevent me from falling asleep. I had become detached from reality, unable to distinguish between what was happening in the world and what was happening in my head. [excerpt

The First Year Frat Experience

It was September 14th and my three weeks were up. I had told myself I had three weeks to make friends. Three weeks before Greek life would dominate the social scene. Publicly, I decried the three week rule, writing it off as dumb or lame. Privately, a part of me wished it could last forever. That night, while my floor pregamed in their rooms, I stayed in mine. I spent a long night alone, listening to the music blasting from dorm rooms and down the streets. I decided to shut the lights off because I didn’t want the world to see what a loser I was. Looking back, I don’t think the world cared, they were too busy having a good time. I went to bed that night promising myself that I would not spend another Friday night alone in my room. I knew I was going to regret not going for a long time. Or so I thought. [excerpt

Landwirtschaftszentrum Haus Düsse der Landwirtschaftskammer Westfalen-Lippe [Agricultural Centre Haus Düsse at the Landwirtschaftskammer Westfalen-Lippe]

Aktivitäten des Landwirtschaftszentrums Haus Düsse im Bereich Versuchswesen mit direktem Bezug zum Ökologischen Landbau: Einsatz heimischer Eiweißfuttermittel in der ökologischen Schweinemast (2000) Modellvorhaben Ökologische Schweinehaltung (seit 2000) Eigenleistungsprüfung von Fleischrindern nach Öko-Richtlinien (seit 2002

Mirrors, Manipulation, and Me

Yesterday I was sick to my stomach. Literally. I tossed and turned all night, woke up and felt sick, and spent the first two hours of my day in bed trying to calm down while. I was worrying that I was a bad friend, student, and girlfriend. The hardest part was that I was criticizing myself for having these insecurities. It’s tough to get out of that cycle, but it’s what I need to do. [excerpt